The one with all the dialogues

I’m an avid TV sitcom viewer since the days of Silver Spoon. A lot of good comedies back then. Perfect Stranger, Murphy Brown, Full House, Family Ties, Ferris Bueller… etc… Then we have the recent ones like Friends, Everybody Loves Raymond, Still Standing… Some have incredible dialogues that most of us could connect with. And some you just can’t get them out of your head.
Here’s a few of my favourite lines;
From 2 guys and a girl:-
Pete: Berg, I’m just not cut out to be a good person.
Berg: I know. That’s why the Lord gave us good looks.
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Ashley: What am I doing here?
Sharon: According to the Bible, to balance out “good.”
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Pete: Ashley, if you’re here, who’s running hell?
From Gilmore Girls:-
Luke: Rory’s not here yet.
Lorelai: Then you’ll have to entertain me until she arrives. Okay Burger boy, dance.
Luke: Will you marry me?
Lorelai: What?
Luke: just looking for something to shut you up.
——————————————————
Lorelai: It’s from my mother.
Rory: What is it?
Lorelai: It’s heavy. Must be her hopes and dreams for me.
——————————————————
Rory: If the house was burning down, what would you save first, the cake or me?
Lorelai: Not fair! The cake doesn’t have legs!
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Richard: Focus, please.
Lorelai: I am a camera.
From Still Standing:-
Judy: Is it just me, or is Bonnie getting a little bossy?
Bill: No, you’re bossy too.
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Judy: Bill, why are you hosing down the backyard?
Bill: Simple. When our lesbian neighbors see how muddy and disgusting our backyard is, they’ll give us that zoning permit to build a deck and a video of them playing shower games with each other.
——————————————————
Lauren: Dad, I need some help with my homework.
Bill: Yeah, I know, I’ve seen your grades.
From That 70’s Show:-
Fez: What’s disco?
Hyde: It’s from Hell. And, not the cool part of hell where all the murderers are either, but the lame-ass part where accountants are from.
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Frank: I did not lose a leg in Vietnam so I could serve hotdogs to teenagers.
Kelso: You got both your legs, Frank.
Frank: Like I said, I did not lose a leg in Vietnam!
——————————————————-
Eric: Bad things keep happening to me, like I have bad luck or something.
Red Forman: Son, you don’t have bad luck. The reason bad things happen to you? is because you’re a dumbass.
——————————————————-
Kelso: I’m sorry. Look, I’ve been screwed by Darwinism… never needed to evolve listening skills ’cause my looks are so highly developed.
Donna: Um, that’s not how evolution works.
Kelso: Yeah, sure it is. Look, say I had to catch my own food, right? But I only ate really fast animals? My feet would eventually evolve into rockets.
From Friends:-
Joey: So, you’re playing a little Playstation, huh? That’s whack. Playstation is whack. ‘Sup with the whack Playstation, ‘sup? Huh? Come on, am I nineteen or what?
Chandler: Yes, on a scale from one to ten, ten being the dumbest a person can look, you are definitely nineteen.
———————————————————
Chandler: Oh, yeah, I’m a gym member. I try to go four times a week, but I’ve missed the last… twelve hundred times.
———————————————————
Ross: You know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that’s half human, half *pure evil*!
———————————————————
Rachel: Can you take care of Emma just for today?
Ross: Sure, just lend me your breasts and we’ll be on our way.
———————————————————
Rachel: Cool. “Urkel” in Spanish is “Urkel.”
———————————————————
Rachel: See? Unisex.
Joey: Maybe *you* need sex. I just had it a few days ago.
Rachel: No, Joey, U-N-I-sex.
Joey: I wouldn’t say no to that.
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